I cant take this anymore.

Im tired of my illness ruling my life. Its like I have no say. My mom is all like why dont you take a year off from school.. I tell her the same thing every single time. School is my only sense of accomplishment/productivity I get. Right now lyme disease has presented nothing but let downs. I still cant walk, this treatment doesnt work, ect... With school I feel productive, like im achieving something. I have my heart set on studying abroad spring semester. I brought it up to my mom today and she said you can only go if I can walk. like i have the ability to choose. I am so frustrated and angry because once again my illness decides what in my life I get to do. Studying in Sweden is something I knew I wanted to do since before even going to college. Spring semester is my chance to go.. my illness is once again the only thing standing in my way. Im sooo fed up. I want to be able to have a say in what I want to do. Ive missed out on too much of my life because of stupid Lyme disease. I really dont want to miss out on this too. Id do anything so I can get well enough to go. Please fate work in my favor. I beg you.