I dont even know what to call this...........

I have spent the weekend home and am having a difficult time going back to school. I am so ready for break its not even funny. I am feeling under the weather adding to the wanting to stay home feeling. I still havent gone christmas shopping. I feel so blah. I just wanna be able to lay out with my dog and not worry about anything. I always put so much stress on myself. It cant be healthy. On the flip side it is what keeps me motivated. When i feel the pressure I cant just sit around. It makes me get off my ass and study or do what I need to be done. That would be great if I didnt feel so shitty and need to just rest for a while. Its a contant inner conflict.